In this video I riff on warding off negative self-talk by filling your brain with other, more positive things – like running!
When I was down in the dumps back in 2016, I knew I needed a change, so I started running. It was painful at first, and didn’t look good (still doesn’t), but it at least gave me a solid 1.5 hours per day where I thinking of something besides my usual pity-party that I was throwing for myself much too frequently.
That time added up, and before I knew it I was thinking about running (which means I wasn’t thinking about that grump-town garbage) when I wasn’t running, so that was more hours thinking of this posi-cool thing that I was really enjoying.
Mind you, running hurt. I started in the summer, too, so it was gross and sweaty. It was painful, uncomfortable, and a bit smelly. But all that was better than spending time thinking about how life was unfair.
For me, it was running, so it’s up to you to find your thing (and if it’s running get in touch and I’ll give you some pointers). To find something you enjoy, that can take an hour, and get you away from your daily grump-town visits.
Audio from this video transcribed below, also available as podcast audio here. This is the start of something new for me, so thanks for your patience.
Hi friends, it’s your pal Seth. Starting something a little new. I hate saying I’m starting something, because I see it so much online, where people start off saying they’re starting something, then two minutes later it ends. That’s me right now.
Because… I talked to so many good friends, creative individuals, talented individuals, people who know like, skill wise stuff, internet, and writing, and all of that, and people that want to get into something. “Oh, I want to do this, I want to start this.”
I’m always, Mr. “just do it! You can do it! Just start, just start!”
And I’ve been saying, and I bat this around in my head a lot, because I really like podcasts, and I like doing video, like as much as I say I like doing them, if I had been doing them since 2014 and 2015, I’d have a lot of videos and audio, and everything like that.
Here we are, this is me starting this. And this is me, too, this is not perfect. There’s not, I’m shooting this in one take, there’s not going to be a fancy infographic, there’s no bumper music, there’s no name, there’s no… just start.
Because I fully believe that the first thing that we all do, is gonna suck. It’s gonna be ass. And I think of so many of my talented friends, photographers and musicians and writers, yeah, probably all our first things sucked. The guitar players I know, the singers I know; sucked. Sorry.
I’ve been playing bass since 1991, that shit sucked. And I think back, started a music blog in 2001, those first few posts sucked.
I want to say too, that, I remember when I started Buzzgrinder I remember i wanted to completely remove me from the news. I wanted it to be, band said this, that’s it, out.
And I realized, like, in this time that we have, with podcasts, with video, with music, I mean with a laptop now, we have the ability to write complete songs, without even having an instrument, which is great, which is amazing. Given how we all have laptops, now, and computers, access to them, which is awesome, but so much of that is… there’s no us in that. There’s no voice in it. There’s no us, which I think is a shame, because… I mean, I know there’s a time and a place for this, but I think with the amount of music that we’re able to make, I think putting “us” in more of this, and that’s what I did with Buzzgrinder, over the years ago… we put ourselves in it, we wrote dumb headlines and made fun of bands and stuff, because no one else was really doing that at the time. Talking 2003, 2004, 2005, and shit, and that got me where I am today in 2019.
What works for me, may not work for you, but what I mean is to put yourself out there, your face, because and again, getting back to why I’m starting this, and being imperfect, being not planned, being spontaneous, you don’t know where that ends. And if we continue to wait til it’s perfect, and researched, and right, and done, and get the domain name, and make sure we have the social media accounts, we’re putting so much of the cart before the horse, when in fact we just need to do it.
The idea, too, I see it so often, of like, “just fail!” Just fail all the time! And it’s not, this is not failing, in that this is seeing what works. This is free, this is absolutely free. I have the phone, I have the internet, and I’m going to be able to put this online, and it’s a free test, it’s free market research, it’s free whatever. I don’t need 100 subscribers tomorrow, I don’t need 10.. I just need to put it out there for me, because I want to have this, I want to…
My ultimate thing would be to go and hangout with friends all the time. I deeply mourn that I was not able to get to Migration Fest last year, and see so many beautiful wonderful people, and have my heart burst with these amazing people. It just didn’t work out last year.
All that to say, I just want to be around good people, I want to vibe with good people, I want to just put my energy into a space where those people exist as well. Because then we embolden each other to do amazing cool things. I see friends of mine on Instagram posting amazing art, building stuff, making amazing photographs, being brave, and just putting this stuff out there.
Years ago I used to think, this was a naive view I had, because I grew up in PA, moved to NYC in 2004, and… this sounds so stupid, but I was like, I don’t understand street art. It’s beautiful, but where’s the domain name? Where’s the click here for more? But it’s not that, it’s not for that, it’s not for building, or brand awareness, it’s for fucking permission. To inspire, and when you look up and see crazy stuff, in crazy locations, hopefully that makes you think like wow, if that person could get up there, and do that, put their lives on the line, and their freedom to evade police, well maybe i can click record on my laptop and record a song. Or maybe I could draw something and maybe be brave today and snap a photo and put it on Instagram.
And that’s where shit starts. As much as I have shit on social media in the past few years, just because of how much of a cesspool and a sewer it can all be, I also believe that, well, fuck that. That gives the win to the trolls and the haters, and the garbage. And no, my friends are there, and I want to be around my friends.
In closing, where does this go? I don’t know. Is this even episode one? I guess we need to classify it as such, of the SETH W TALKING INTO A PHONE SHOW, I’ll think of a better name, or you can suggest one.
All that to say, please start. Don’t be disheartened. Keep making music. Please keep posting it. Be scared, because putting stuff out there is damn scary, and people can say mean things, but the people saying mean things aren’t making things, so who cares? Make things, because then other people that makes things, that might be right at that level, there’s not way up, there’s on the same wavelength, trying to figure it out, I don’t know if I should put my stuff out there, I don’t know if I should put my music to SoundCloud, or put my photos on Instagram, they’re gonna see it, and that’s energy. That’s good. Then they’re going to put stuff up, because we’re all coming up in this together. In this new everything, and we are in a new everything right now, in 2019. We’re all trying to figure this out. Freelancers, artists, musicians, all trying to figure this out.
So put your stuff out there, just keep putting it out there, why not? It’s free. I mean don’t, I guess if you want to take a picture of fecal matter, and post it somewhere, sure, that’s disgusting, I should edit this out, I’m not going to. Yeah, put yourself out there, don’t be disheartened, don’t hold back, why hold back? It’s free to post this stuff everywhere, and for every 10 people that even like it, there’s probably 25 people that do like it and just haven’t hit that heart, or like, or replied, so keep putting your stuff up.
Don’t let fear, don’t let that rejection, just keep making and disengage with people that don’t make, and just leave comments, and are negative, because we ain’t got time for that.
You know the dreaded question at parties, “so what do you do?”
Worse, if you’re a photographer or musician or writer, you don’t want people on the internet to wonder the same thing.
If someone looked at your social media profiles today, or god forbid your website, would they know what you do. Like, really, do you spell it out?
It took me awhile to get this, too, so I’m finally getting around to taking my own advice here, but honestly… take a step back and think about it.
I bring this up because I’ve had these talks lately with friends, about what we want to do, yet we don’t really put it out there. We talk about it, sure, but we have a hard time asking for it, much less displaying what it is we want.
Be around the people who are on the same “dream wave length.”
There are probably plenty of people in your life that probably don’t want to hear your dream talk. They don’t want to hear about your art, or how you want to tour, or make photographs. That’s okay, they’re not dreamers.
Save your dream talk for fellow dreamers, the folks who dare have lofty goals and ambitions. Those need to be your people, your tribe.
You find them by putting your dreams out into the universe.
You publish that poem, post that song, upload that art, start that podcast… you shoot them into the sky like a rocket, over and over again, waiting for other dreamers to find you. Friendships are built, bonds are made.
That dream DNA seeks out that dream DNA. That’s where I believe that yearning comes from. The feeling that something isn’t quite right. You’re unsettled.
You need to dream, and put those dreams out there.
That may not mean “making it” in the short term, but surrounding yourself with dreamers, people who want your dreams just as bad as you do, you’ll make it in your own way.
Jocelyn Aucoin asked a great question on Twitter today, and I’m writing a blog post about so it doesn’t get lost in the river of social media posts by tomorrow (here’s the link).
For me it was realizing that opposing vibes can’t exist at the same time.
If I listen to good music, and dance, and fist pump, it’s impossible to stress and worry, so now I just dance all the time.
Sure, I can’t do that 24/7, but I find the more momentum I build throughout the day, the less likely I’m going to fall into any evening funk, which reminds me of some other wise words:
I have a very simple rule that serves me well: Don’t think too much about your life after dinnertime. Thinking too much at the end of the day is a recipe for despair. Everything looks better in the light of the morning.
There isn’t a magical formula for success that relates directly to when you do your best work.
Every roommate I’ve ever had goes to bed around 11, so for me, the night is really nice because everything gets really quiet. I’m a big believer in not going to bed before something’s done, so I usually get around two hours of work in somewhere between 10:30 p.m. and 1:30 a.m.
I started waking up real early, and started creating at 7 a.m, like real full-on sessions, not just like I’m poking around. I’m in. What I started doing before that was the last move of the night I clean the whole studio. Fill up the water pitcher, when I wake up I have the teapot ready, there’s nothing to do except get started. And I realized there sun’s shining down, you’ve got that pure energy, you’re just up, and all of a sudden it was turning 11 a.m and I hadn’t even looked at my phone and I was like, oh I just learned how to do it.
If you’re not a morning person, it’s okay. If you’re a night owl, great.
Personally I get up early and get cracking at some work, then I have the rest of the morning and afternoon to tackle my biggest work. And honestly, I’ll let some tasks slide into the early evening, because by then I am motoring, and can buzz through whatever else is on my to-do list.
If success is only this one thing, then anyone else who doesn’t hit that mark is then… not successful? Like so many things in life, it’s not so black and white, and we need to find so much of that for ourselves.
Perhaps my current situation isn’t on par with other 40-somethings, but that’s okay, because I’m happy, the bills are paid, and well… yeah, that’s success for me. Sure, there’s countless other bullet points I could list, but why? They aren’t for you, or your life, you need to figure that out, too.
Eight years ago I was on a bike with no job and some money in the bank, and I look back, and I was having fun. That was fine for that moment, and informed who I am today, and that’s okay.
Would I have liked to “arrived” a little bit quicker than 2018? Sure, but as they say it’s the journey, not the destination. I know I wouldn’t be able to appreciate all of what I have now if it just sprang out of nowhere.